At Work

Safety in Numbers

Out of my way the team meeting is here

Out of my way the team meeting is here

 

In the workplace, this means one thing, another dreaded team.  No matter how you slice it, it also means that no one is accountable for any one thing thus no one can be blamed, and getting something of value done will take twice as long as necessary.  How important is this safety net, well if you have been on a job interview recently, you were no doubt asked, “Please describe the most recent team in which you participated and what was accomplished.”  Of course, this will require a bold-faced lie with regard to the accomplishment.  If you are lucky, you are asked directly, “Are you a team player?”   With this question, you have a better chance of not telling a lie, especially if you happen to play on a weekend softball team. 

I am listening to a team conference call now.  It has been going on for 15 minutes and it is just concluded that an answer to a previously asked question, was not, in fact an answer to the question asked.  People are talking around, through and past others, “points” are rehashed and revisited, and topics are changed on the turn of a dime.  Who’s on first?  Listen closely to this team and you will hear every current buzzword possible…buzzwords make people feel good, you know with it, cool, part of the in crowd. If you are not up on the latest buzzwords, it’s like you forged your MBA certificate.

Actually, it appears that most of the team on the call is either not paying attention, has no clue why they are on the call or is checking their Blackberry (r).  Why are they on the call you may ask?  Go ahead and ask; that is like asking directions to the Holy Grail.  A half hour now wasted and growing rapidly, who cares if we are being productive.  “I don’t have time to do things, like twice.”  Really, I assume the rest of the team does have all that extra time. 

And we are worried about global warming? Who said that?

Therefore, if you want to play it safe, be a team player at work, there is safety in numbers.

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Categories: At Work

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